Hooking Up While Traveling: Is It Safe For Solo Travelers?
Let’s be honest: We have all fantasized or dreamed about traveling and finding the love of our lives wandering the streets of a distant country. Since most of the time, our time in certain destinations is short, the further we can reach is a travel fling or travel hook-up. Hooking up while traveling has been a topic that hasn’t been discussed yet to the extent it deserves. For this reason, I am starting this whole series about hooking up on vacation, having safe backpacking sex, the easiest countries to get laid as a female traveler, the best places for couples sex travel, and things you should be aware of on hookups while traveling.
Hooking Up While Traveling: How Does It Happen?
Normally, the place where travel hook-ups begin is in dating apps and in some non-dating apps as well. The most important thing is being clear about your intentions with the fact that you are traveling. Be friendly and open enough to integrate into this new culture and place you are visiting. Also, you need to be careful.
Some hookups begin in other magical places we stay while traveling: hostels. The mix of hormones, adventure, exploring new places, and familiarity that hostels provide is a bomb mix for hooking up while traveling. Whether you met your match in a hostel or on a dating app, here comes the first security issue that you need to remember.
Security Issue #1: Do not tell firsthand that you are traveling on your own
If you are a solo female traveler, please do not disclose this information so quickly while traveling. Test the waters first, and meet this person in a public space before sharing this information. Always tell someone back home or your plans if you know someone in your destination. That way, connecting with you if anything happens will be easier, and you will have a support system.
Should Hooking Up While Traveling Be A Plan?
This is sort of a personal decision. You decide to travel for a different series of reasons. Some destinations call your name, which makes you wonder and wander out of curiosity. I will never say, “If hooking up while traveling is your goal, don’t do it”. I think that each of us has in our bag a different set of motivations to discover a place: sex can be one of them. Everything is legit unless you are affecting the locals. If hooking up while traveling does not promote an abusive tourism sex scene in the destination and you are protecting yourself, there is no reason to judge you.
Hooking Up While Traveling: Let’s Talk Deeply About Hostels
Let’s start with the obvious part: Although many people older than 20 love hostels, hostels are meant to be for young people with a low travel budget. Having many people sharing rooms and some level of intimacy in their 20s, their first experiences far from home, make it a suitable place for hookups. If you are a person who is considering staying in a hostel for the first time or has stayed in a few, maybe there are things you need to consider first.
Broadly, hostels tend to be divided into two categories: party hostels and the ones that are a bit quieter. During my hostel years, I went to hostels known for their party vibes and some that weren’t. I can assure you something: there were hookups in all of the themes.
I had the experience in two different hostels waking up in the middle of the night and seeing people hooking up right in front of me (I also had the chance to be the one hooking up, a lot more discreetly). There is another thing to be discussed: These situations might happen even if you stay in a female dorm.
There are two things you can do about hostel hook: Be the person to tell to the front desk (news flash: most of them are also travelers willing to hook up!) or understand that these tend to be things that happen and that hooking up while traveling is completely normal. It is up to you on which side you choose to be and trust me, there will be a moment in life when the way you approach hostels becomes different.
Find a hostel for your next trip
Hooking Up While Traveling: This Is My Story
I have been a solo female traveler around the world for a while. My first solo trip was in 2013; I was 23 years old. In most of my time as a traveler, I have been single. Let’s not over-analyze why or what are the reasons why I have been single for so long. At some point in my life, hooking up while traveling became one of my motivations to keep traveling. It was evident that in most destinations I will have the experience to have experiences beyond with some locals.
Do I recommend you to do the same? Should hooking up while traveling should be what you’re doing? Do you know what are you looking for in a relationship or sexual rapport? This is something completely personal. I have plenty of friends who avoid hooking up while traveling and I respect that. My biggest recommendation would be to not limit yourself from meeting people on the place you’re visiting; this rapport doesn’t need to be sexual.
Security Issue #2: Always consider a Travel Insurance
If you are hooking up while traveling or not, having travel insurance is essential. One of the travel insurances I recommend is Safetywing Travel Insurance. For $45, you get 28 days of coverage while traveling knowing you will have with whom to count on if you have an emergency during your trip. I recommend quoting your coverage for your next trip on Safetywing!
A Few Tips on Hooking Up While Traveling
If you decided to be the one hooking up while traveling with that cute local, I want you to know these tips”
1. Don’t be afraid to look for tour guides on dating apps
What I mean with this is that a great conversation starter on any dating app is that “you are looking for a local to show you around”. This tends to bring out the best in people and might lead to hot hookups. You are starting your dynamic positioning as the traveler (not giving out the details of whom you’re traveling with) and if it didn’t work for the hook-up part, you gained a local experience.
2. Don’t be scared to escalate a Couchsurfing approach
Couchsurfing is a place for meeting and/or staying with locals while traveling. It also has an amazing hang-out feature where you can meet with other people to grab a coffee or anything else. Anything else, even if you don’t necessarily disclose it in your profile, can be hooking up after meeting each other. If the chemistry is there, scale that!
3. Hostels are the best places to be hooking up while traveling
As I have already exposed, hostels are natural places to be hooking up while traveling, either with locals or fellow travelers. If you plan to add this extra touch to your trip, staying in a hostel might lead you to a hot hookup.
4. Doesn’t matter how you are hooking up; don’t let this get into creating memories on that trip
Let’s discuss this a bit further and give some examples. Imagine you just hooked up with Marco (a fictional character) in Rome, and deep inside of you, you want Marco to be part of your experiences in Rome still and come to try some of the best gelato in Italy with you before you leave. The problem is that after that hot hook-up moment you had with Marco, he is ghosting you because… we know people can do this sort of thing. I want you not to lose yourself overthinking why he is not appearing instead of exploring Rome.
If Marco is ghosting you, Rome is still there. Go to the Trevi Fountain to go back to the city someday and keep on exploring and having fun. I am sure that while doing that, you will also meet Fabio or Federico. Hooking up while traveling has to be an experience you will remember dearly, not something that will hurt you.